an ex situation.

So - I'm back to posting a comedic synopsis of my dating life, or lack there of. I've come to the conclusion over the past few years that for whatever reason ... I am 'that girl' who dates a guy, breaks up with him, we remain somewhat friends, and then 30 days later ( and I'm serious about this 30 days because it's like clock work ) he is in another relationship.

Now I have theories about why this might be. Possibly because I'm 'that girl' that is too independent, I never really give off that vibe that I 'need a guy' because in my mind ... that could be one of the most dangerous things ever. OR - I could be that girl that is just not relationship material. Maybe I'm that one crazy fun girl that is too flighty for anything serious and long-term ... and once they've dated me - they realize the next one that comes along is a 'keeper.'

I'm not quite sure where I went wrong in this whole process ... but I know I took a wrong turn somewhere along the way ... because at this moment 2 of my ex's are now engaged ... and I'm ONLY 24. Oh yeah, and I'm predicting another one is on his way to engagement, which freaks me out .... no I'm serious ... really freaks me out.

Okay - so you're probably wondering why the hell I'm writing this ... and what this little theory is that I have about this whole ex situation. I know I'm never going to be that girl that will do anything for a guy. I am a very independent person, and can only hope to find someone who appreciates that quality and is in turn just as independent if not more than myself.

What got me thinking about this little predicament was the episode of the Bachelorette that I watched on tv last night. As sad as that sounds - it actually opened my eyes to what I'm looking for in a man. This woman gets a room full of 30 men and gets to weed them out one-by-one ... say 'nope, sorry you're not the one ... LATER!' Now that, I admire. However, I can't even imagine how terribly hard it must be to turn down so many eligable bachelors in such a short amount of time.

So, last night I asked myself ... what would I do in her situation, and who would I choose. Then I realized that I could NEVER go on one of those shows .. meet a guy maybe 2 real times and actually have a conversation and before you even have time to blink - you're engaged. Oh hell no. I have dated guys for 2 years or more and even then I still wasn't sure if I completely knew them entirely. A pretty scary thought.

I have also realized one very important thing in my life. I have a guy who has been there for me through years of madness, through high school, college, city life, the awkward and confusions young - professional stage, and still he is the one I can turn to. Now I'm not talking marriage material ... or am I ?! I could possibly be too flighty and confused to ever committ to anything at this juvenile age of 24.

So - I suppose I will keep to my single lifestyle ... in hopes that the next one doesn't fall through the cracks and land in 'engagement' thirty days later.